Are You Living On Purpose?

This week in my Life Alchemy Workshop we’re focusing on the part of our lives dealing with career and life path/life mission. This section deals with the way we bring our talents and gifts to the world. When things are going well in this section, you’ll feel like your natural talents and gifts are fully being made use of and in a way that perfectly complements your values. You'll feel like you're living on purpose. When you have this type of alignment in your career, anything you do for work will be a joy. Your life path, however, is not just about what you do in your career.

When you look at the feng shui bagua map, you’ll notice that the career/life path section (bottom center) is different from the section dealing with wealth and prosperity (top left). They’re definitely related, but they’re not one and the same.

When you think about this distinction, it makes sense. For many people, including myself, parenting is part of their life path/life mission. It is not generally a way of bringing in income. Quite the reverse actually. Conversely, you can have a job that is rather lucrative, but does not make good use of your gifts and talents. I felt this way about law practice. I was very well remunerated, but I felt like the job was sucking my soul. It made use of a few of my gifts and talents, but not enough of them and not enough of the time. The rest of the time, I had to do tasks that were not a comfortable fit. I felt like a fish out of water. Now, in comparison, I feel like virtually every thing I do is in line with my talents, gifts, and values. My current work feels like the perfect pool for me.

Transitioning to this line of work did not magically happen for me. I spent a lot of time exploring my gifts, talents, and values. I created a personal mission statement, and made a commitment to live by that statement. I invested in coaching and classes to help me stay the course. It took faith in myself and a higher power, a lot of baby steps, and some patience. But it did happened. Some aspects of my mission statement are still aspirational, but I continue to take daily steps in the direction.

If you are feeling like you are not quite living your purpose and you may not be on the right path, I suggest that you first put together a personal mission statement. A personal mission is a statement of your core values and highest goals. A useful mission statement should include two pieces: what you wish to accomplish and contribute, and who you want to be - the character strengths and qualities you wish to develop. If you’d like some guidance, check out this website for a free personal mission statement wizard.

[30 Day Blogging Challenge - Day 4]

Monick P. Halm, Esq. is the founder of Equilawbrium Career & Life Coaching. As a coach, law of attraction student, Reiki Master, and former lawyer, Monick inspires and supports lawyers and other professionals in crafting their careers and lives so that they are ones of balance, passion, and joy.

What Stories Will They Tell About You?

"Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." –Will Rogers

I agree with the above quote, but would add “live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip, because you know that she’s going to have some great stories to tell.” Live your life so that you give them something to talk about. Make your life an epic and interesting tale.

Maybe my addition to the above quote is redundant. I’d be embarrassed if all my parrot had to talk about was what I was watching on television. I want my parrot to have some really great stories to share. Don’t you? I want my parrot to talk about a life of passion, love, adventure, intrigue, success, compassion, and courage. If your proverbial parrot were given away today, what kind of stories would it squawk about? Are you living the kind of life you want the town to talk about? If not, think about what story you do want to live. What would you want your biographers to say? When you figure it out start living so that your parrot will be evidence of a interesting life lived fully and completely.

[30 Day Blogging Challenge - Day 3]

Monick P. Halm, Esq. is the founder of Equilawbrium Career & Life Coaching. As a coach, law of attraction student, Reiki Master, and former lawyer, Monick inspires and supports lawyers and other professionals in crafting their careers and lives so that they are ones of balance, passion, and joy.

A Message from the Universe

Every weekday in my e-mail inbox I receive Notes from the Universe. They’re these amusing and inspirational little messages written by Mike Dooley, aka “The Universe.” Today’s message I thought was particularly great:

“If someone wants ‘A’ to happen, yet they prepare for ‘B,’ they will always get ‘B.’ Prepare for ‘A’ - The Universe.”

Many people prepare for the worst case scenario. I used to always hope for the best, but expect the worst. I figured that way, whatever I got wouldn’t be so disappointing. I wasn’t disappointed, but was creating less than ideal scenarios. Now I hope for the best, prepare for the best, and enjoy whatever I get anyway. It’s often even better than I thought.

***

P.S. I’ve taken on a blogging challenge, so every day for the next 29 days (I blogged yesterday) I will be posting something. I hope you join me! Also, please let me know if you have any topics you’d like me to write about or any questions you’d like for me to answer.

Monick P. Halm, Esq. is the founder of the Reiki Coach and Equilawbrium Career & Life Coaching. As a coach, law of attraction student, Reiki Master, and former lawyer, Monick inspires and supports lawyers and other professionals in crafting their careers and lives so that they are ones of balance, passion, and joy.

Are you just moaning when you should be moving?

“If you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it.” ~Anthony J. D'Angelo, The College Blue Book

Les Brown tells this great story:

One afternoon a man walks past a house and sees a cute old couple rocking in their rocking chairs reading the paper. Lying in between them is a dog moaning as if its in pain. The man silently wonders what the dog is moaning about as he walks past.

The next afternoon the man walks past the same house. Again the couple is out there rocking in their chairs, sipping iced tea, and reading. Again the dog is lying in between them and moaning. The man is a bit worried about the dog, but he again passes and says nothing.

The third day the man makes a point of walking in front of the old couple’s house to check on the dog. He’s distressed to find the same scene - the old couple contentedly reading while the dog moans in pain. The young man feels compelled to say something.

“Excuse me” he calls out to the couple. “What’s wrong with your dog?”

“Oh him?” the old woman said, pointing the dog. “He’s just moaning because he is lying on a nail.”

The young man is confused. “If he’s lying on a nail and its so uncomfortable, why doesn’t he just get up and move?”

The little old lady smiled at him and said “Well honey, it hurts just enough for him to moan about it, but not enough for him to move yet.”

***

Do you recognize yourself in that couple’s old dog? I know there have been times in my life when I’ve done my share of moaning when I should have been moving. Many people spend a lot of energy moaning about problems that they have the power to fix. Often the problems aren’t even that difficult to fix, but we get in the habit of moaning and forget that we could just move. We think that moaning/whining/complaining is going to make it better -- maybe if we moan long and loud enough someone will come and move the nail for us or carry us away. It almost never happens that way. Moaning just usually makes the nail seem that much more painful. So when you read this story, ask yourself: are you lying on a nail and just moaning about it? If so, stop moaning and start moving!

[30 Day Blogging Challenge: Day 1]

Monick P. Halm, Esq. is the founder of The Reiki Coach and Equilawbrium Career & Life Coaching. As a coach, law of attraction student, Reiki Master, and former lawyer, Monick inspires and supports lawyers and other professionals in crafting their careers and lives so that they are ones of balance, passion, and joy.

How To Speed Your Physical Recovery

“A lot of people say they want to get out of pain, and I'm sure that's true, but they aren't willing to make healing a high priority. They aren't willing to look inside to see the source of their pain in order to deal with it.” ~Lindsay Wagner

A little while ago a friend of mine was about to go into the hospital to get her tonsils removed. She e-mailed me to ask for my suggestions on how she could heal better. She wanted to have a speedy and pleasant healing experience. I think my response to her could be useful to others, so I am sharing my e-mail.

“Dear [Friend],

I'm sending lots of positive thoughts your way and am holding the awareness that you are already healthy, whole, and complete. Illness is the beginning of healing, so congratulations for creating this situation to bring you higher.

[My friend had decided that she was going to write a recovery blog, but wanted other suggestions for how to promote healing.] You are of course brilliant for writing the recovery blog -- the script of a blessed and easy recovery. That's already an excellent step to take for healing. Since you've asked for my suggestions on other ways to take yourself higher, here you go:

1. Ask you body what lesson she is trying to send you. The tonsils are around the area of the fifth chakra -- the throat chakra/seat of communication. Is there perhaps an issue about speaking your truth out into the world that your body is sending you? Tune into that area of pain and ask if Anything else come up when you ask your body? Pain is your body's cry for help. It sends messages subtly, but when those messages are ignored they end up getting stronger and stronger. Listening to the message will help you heal.
2. Organize yourself around your pleasure ... really indulge in whatever makes you feel good. Revel in sensual pleasures... flowers for the eyes, wonderful scents (lavender is relaxing; peppermint or citrus are energizing), tastes (whatever tastes good to you -- whatever that will be when you have your tonsils out); tactile (love from your honey, but also wonderful fabrics... silks, velvets, etc.)
3. Allow others to serve you. Their service is a gift to you. Your accepting it is a gift to them.
4. Laugh as much as possible. Laughter really is one of nature's best medicines. I recently spent the weekend with some friends in Canberra and the husband is a doctor. He was telling me how studies have shown that laughter literally repairs DNA and sadness destroys it. Laugh, laugh, laugh. Call the laughter yoga line. Watch funny movies or tv shows. Read funny books. Hang out with people who make you laugh, etc
5. Use positive mantras for your healing. "Every atom in my body is healthy, whole, and complete." "Everything in my life is healing right now." "I am willing to change the mental conditions that have created this situation." "I am willing to heal." I know you know how to create and use mantras, so pick or create whatever resonates most for you.
6. Create a vision board. It can be for your entire life or it can be limited to this period of recovery. What do you want to create during this time?
7. Receive Reiki. Reiki promotes your natural healing energy. It’s a relaxing and wonderful way to complement other healing modalities.”

Those were my suggestions for promoting healing. If you have others, I would love to hear about them. Please comment!

What would you do if you only had one year left to live?

"A man should not leave this earth with unfinished business. He should live each day as if it was a pre-flight check. He should ask each morning, am I prepared to lift-off?” ~Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, All is Vanity, 1991

A few years ago (four years ago to be exact) I took a self-development course and was given an exercise to work on:

if you had only 365 days to live, you didn't have to worry about money or your health during the year, and on the 365th day you would die easily and painlessly, what would you do with your year?

I considered this exercise and wrote an earnest answer. I wrote it all down in a journal and then put that journal in a briefcase I barely touched for the next 4 years. Recently I used that briefcase as I flew on a trip to New York and discovered my answer to this exercise. I was rather pleasantly surprised to see that pretty much every goals for my imaginary final year I managed to accomplish over the past 4 years. Those included quitting my law job, finding the love of my life, having a baby girl, writing a book, and traveling around the world.

I was rather pleasantly surprised by how all these goals that seemed rather far away when I wrote them had all come to pass. It made me think, what if I spent the next 365 days as if they were my last? What if every day I considered really seriously how I want to live my “final year”? What kind of adventures would I go on then? How would my life be different? And thus my Last Year Project was born. I challenged myself to live fully from this space for 365 days. If you want to follow my adventures, you can do so here.

I would like to challenge you to answer the question I answered four years ago: if you had only 365 days to live, you didn't have to worry about money or your health during the year, and on the 365th day you would die easily and painlessly, what would you do with your year? Feel free to share your response to this question in the comments.

What's In Your Backpack?

"Simplicity is making the journey of this life with just baggage enough." ~Charles Dudley Warner

A couple nights ago I watched Up in the Air with George Clooney. In the movie George Clooney’s character is an inspirational speaker who gives a talk called “What’s In Your Backpack?” In this talk he uses the metaphor of a backpack that contains all of our possessions and commitments. He argues that all our relationships and stuff is too much extra baggage to carry around. It is so heavy that it’s nearly impossible to move. He counsels that we should walk around life with an empty backpack - free of these things that weigh us down.

It’s true that some stuff and people in our lives can be onerous, but do you really want an empty backpack? As I went for my run today I started to think about that. I see his point that certain possessions can really weigh you down - it may feel like they end up owning you instead of vice versa. While I have been focusing on simplifying my life and getting rid of things that I no longer need, I decided I definitely wouldn’t want to get rid of all possessions. In addition to a few prized possessions, I’m happy to fill my backpack with assets (in the Rich Dad, Poor Dad meaning of the word.) Income-producing property (whether real property, investments, or intellectual property) is the type of property that won’t weigh you down... rather it lifts you up. I wouldn’t mind having much less of the other stuff, but I’m happy to fill my backpack with real assets.

With regards to people... it’s true that there are some people that are real downers. They come with too much baggage and they drain your energy. It’s ok to take those types of people out of your backpack. However, there are people with whom you have very meaningful relationships. These are the people who lift you up, help carry your burdens, and sometimes help carry you. Those are definitely keepers. Not only do they make the journey easier, they also make it fun.

So do I want to have an empty backpack? Not a chance!