Life of Engagement

"Let the beauty of what you love be what you do" ~ Rumi.

"'Total control' of one's own mind is in fact too strong an expression to describe accurately what happens when one is in flow. The point is not that one can always do what one wants, but rather that the possibility of making things happen as one wishes is present in a way that seldom occurs in 'real' life. "~Mihaly Czikszentmihaly

Over the past few weeks I've written about the different paths to happiness. I wrote about the Pleasurable Life and the Meaningful Life. Now it's time for the final piece -- Engagement. This path to happiness is called "The Good Life," or the "life of engagement."

The Good Life has to do with the amount of immersion, absorption, and flow that individuals feel when optimally engaged with their primary activities. These states are experienced when there is a positive match between a person's strength and the task they are doing, i.e. when they feel confident that they can accomplish the tasks they face. The more amount of time spent involved in these types of activities, called "flow" experiences, the more satisfaction a person will have in their lives. Engagement, especially when it's meaningful (or in service of something greater than ourselves), is the truest path to lasting contentment.

So what exactly is a "flow" experience? A flow activity is one in which you are totally engaged, your actions seem effortless, and time appears to stand still. Flow generally occurs when a person is doing his or her favorite activity. For some people a flow activity is playing tennis or running (especially at that point that you're in "runner's high"). For others it's painting a picture, playing chess, having an engaging conversation with your best friend, or playing with a baby. Many people, especially if they enjoy their job, experience flow at work. Engaging in a complicated surgery, closing a business deal, or designing new computer software can all be flow activities. Very rarely, however, do people report flow in passive leisure activities, such as watching television or relaxing.

How can you create more flow experiences in your life? By first knowing what your signature strengths are and then recrafting your life to use them as often as possible -- in the areas of your work, your romance, your friendships, your hobbies, your parenting, etc. The more you use what you're good at, the more flow you will have in your life. Here is an example from Martin Seligman about using your strengths to create more flow in your life:

"I can give you some examples of what I mean by recrafting your life to use your signature strength and getting flow. One person I worked with was a bagger at Genuardi's. She didn't like bagging, took the signature strengths test, and her highest strength was social intelligence. And so she recrafted her job to make the encounter with her the social highlight of every customer's day. She obviously failed at that a lot, but by deploying the single thing she was best at, she changed the job from one in which time hung heavy on her hands into one in which time flew by."

You can find and take a free signature strengths test on Martin Seligman's website: www.authentichappiness.org. When you find out what your signature strengths are, use them as often as possible to get in the flow. If you become more engaged with everything that you do you'll find that your satisfaction with life will skyrocket.

For more on Flow, check out this great article by Mihaly Czikszentmihaly in Psychology Today about Finding Flow.